Friday, October 12, 2007

Daisy Duke Learns My Secret

A week after the dinner with MBA Man and Photo Guy, I told Daisy Duke.

It was a Friday afternoon in the SG office, and no one was around. I told her about how two of the girls had stopped by my dorm room the previous evening and joked with me about my place on the Kinsey scale that they were studying in Human Sexuality class. I told her that if they knew the truth they would probably crap their pants. Then I basically explained the conversation with Apple Guy again, because of course she’d heard about it.

She was great about it—asked how long I’d felt this way, If my parents knew, etc…the general questions, but was totally understanding.

Afterwards, I emailed MBA Man:

“…This whole thing is just, well weird. I'm sure it always is. But up until 2 weeks ago I didn't have the slightest desire to address this with anyone, except maybe you guys...honestly I'd planned to tell you even before the whole [Apple Guy] conversation. It's as if a switch flipped. Is it that I'd finally had enough of the jokes? Is it that I'm leaving and figure a select few that I intend to keep in contact with should know? Why now...its not like these are new feelings. I know you don't have the answers but sometimes typing them out helps I guess LOL. I can't exactly blog this as you did...”

Of course I have ended up blogging it.

He responded:

“I think that you have now started to tell people due to the combination of everything. You are leaving and you realize that it doesn't really matter and you probably have had enough. Basically, that is what it takes, really. It all comes to a point when you have had enough and realize it does not mater one iota what other people think. Some people never get this far, and deny it all their lives. We all just want to be happy and this is the first step to doing so. Trust only gets easier too. However, it does seem like you have lost something...almost like you held something over all of society and now you are like...too bad suckers...I am free!!!! “

I don’t know if I felt free, and I still don’t but there is truth there. His support has been invaluable.